When it comes to facial hair, people have very different opinions. Whilst some really like the look of mustaches and beards, some really don’t. If you’re in a relationship with someone that has a beard and/or mustache, and you don’t like them, it’s a difficult situation to be in.
Obviously, if you started dating him when he had facial hair, it’s even more difficult, as you’ve only dated him whilst he’s had the facial hair in question. If the facial hair is a new ‘thing’, there are a few ways in which you can try to convince your boyfriend to ditch the moustache, so let’s look at how you can get the boyfriend to shave the mustache, without upsetting him.
Bring up the topic at the right time
Don’t bring up the topic when he is tired or stressed. You will be more likely to get a negative response if you bring up the topic when your boyfriend is already feeling stressed.
Don’t bring up the topic when you are angry. Your boyfriend may respond negatively to your request if he feels as though you are upset about something else. And you’re bringing it up because of his mustache’s appearance rather, than because of any other reason, such as how it makes you feel about him.
Don’t bring up the topic when you are in a rush or unprepared for an answer from him. Make sure that there is plenty of time for both of you before deciding to talk about this issue.
So that there aren’t other things distracting either one of them from having a thorough discussion about it without getting off task or becoming frustrated with each other’s opinions on what should happen next regarding shaving habits.
Explain your feelings, being both be open and honest
Rather than just saying, “I don’t like your mustache,” try being more specific and honest. Try to explain why it bothers you without making him feel bad about himself. Some men are sensitive about their facial hair, so be careful when talking to them about it. If you really want him to shave his mustache, then just tell him that flat out! Tell him that you prefer clean shaven guys over mustached ones because you find them more attractive or handsome.
Respect his decision
It’s important to respect his decision, but you can still express your own feelings and opinions. If he decides not to shave his mustache, tell him how it makes you feel and why it is important to you, for him to shave it.
If the two of you are able to talk about this without getting upset or angry at each other, then great. Now he knows how much it means to you, to see his smooth, clean shaven face. If he doesn’t want to shave his mustache no matter what, then there’s not a lot you can do. Ultimately, it’s his face and his choice, and you have to respect his decision.
Compromise is important in every relationship
Every relationship is based on compromise. Compromise does not mean that you give up what you want, but rather finding a middle ground where both of you are happy and comfortable.
Whilst his mustache might make you unhappy, is there something you can do as a compromise to help him, or make him happy. Like playing Xbox with him, or allowing his friends over to watch the football. By compromising, you both win.
Communication is key
It’s important to communicate your needs in a relationship, and if you get pushback, try to explain it differently. It’s possible that your boyfriend is reluctant to change his mustache because he thinks it makes him look cool or handsome or unique, and that might be true.
But if the only reason he has it is that other people think it looks good on him, and not because he likes having facial hair. You could try to remind him of this fact by saying something like: “I love how confident you are! I want us both to feel good about ourselves and our appearance together, so maybe we can work together on making sure that happens.
If you want your boyfriend to shave his mustache, it’s important that you communicate your needs in a relationship. If he doesn’t want to do it, try to explain it in a different way.
Often times when people are upset about something like this, they assume that their partner feels the same way but just won’t say anything about it.
Instead of making him feel bad for not wanting to get rid of his ‘stache, tell him how much better it makes you feel when he shaves (or at least trims). Explain why shaving is important for both parties and show appreciation for what he does have done already.
Does the mustache cause you discomfort when kissing? Try to explain that
Does the mustache cause you discomfort when kissing? Try to explain that. Kissing someone with a mustache can be uncomfortable, and leave your lips and chin feeling sore and inflamed – which is no fun at all.
You can also tell him how uncomfortable it makes you feel when he kisses you with his mustache. If the reason you don’t like his mustache is for personal reasons, with the discomfort it causes you, rather than being an aesthetics issue, it’s more likely he’ll be open to removing the mustache, so you don’t suffer from irritation.
So, how should you approach your boyfriend about his mustache? If he hasn’t noticed that you dislike it, then gently pointing out some of the reasons you don’t care for it might be enough to get him thinking about getting rid of it.
If he has noticed your disapproval but refuses to get rid of the ‘stache, then you may need to have a serious talk with him about why keeping his mustache is more important than making you happy.
In any event, trying to get your boyfriend to shave or wax his mustache can be tricky, since men tend to take their facial hair very seriously.
Make sure that when you approach him about getting rid of the mustache, you are as nice and sympathetic as possible in order not to hurt his feelings or make him feel self-conscious about himself (nobody likes a mean girlfriend!).
At the end of the day, however much or little hair he chooses to have on his face is up to him—but if you dislike it so strongly that it gets in the way of your happiness together as a couple, then something needs to change.
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